I’ve done the whole blogging thing before but it did not go well.
Writing and I have a complicated relationship. For a while, writing was what I lived for. I knew when I sat down with a pencil in hand or with my keyboard in front of me that something freeing was about to begin. Just for a little while I would be allowed to escape reality and disappear into a world of my making. Then I hit college and the mountain of academic papers I had to write destroyed any desire I once had to come up with stories. I was burnt out and uninterested.
Lately life has been throwing curve balls at me and I have once again found solace in writing out my thoughts. The fact that I recently purchased an iPad has made it even easier for me to pause throughout the day, pull it out, and spend some time plucking away at the on screen keyboard. Since this desire to write has returned I have often thought about starting a blog, but always found a reason not to. Oh, I am no good at making blogs look good, I would tell myself. Who wants to read a blog that is hosted on a default layout? No one will want to read what I write, I’ll just be blathering on is another thought that often comes to mind. The way I’ve come to see it though is this: If people read it, they read it. If people don’t, they don’t. If my layout turns away someone from reading what it is okay. In the same way, if what I write is completely uninteresting to anyone else except me, that is okay too.
Do not get me wrong, I still feel anxious as hell writing this and putting my thoughts out there. In this blog I will talk about life, faith, and psychology and will probably get personal. That scares me. However, today I went to a leadership conference where the keynote speaker challenged my fear of doing.
Most people want to make a difference but don’t want to live differently. -Bob Goff
I do not want to be someone who listens to inspiring words, thinks “gee, that’s inspiring,” and then does nothing to change her life. I want to be someone who makes a difference. Unfortunately, making a difference usually means stepping out of my comforting zone and living differently. It is hard, but a task I believe I am ready to tackle.
So I am starting a blog…again. I am putting myself out there in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, by living differently I can make a difference.